The Hound of the Baskervilles


Meet Tonka. Her name used to be Honkytonk, but they were calling her Honky for short. Now, even if I didn’t have neighbors of many colors, I wouldn’t be real hot about stepping out my door and yelling ‘Honky!’. I also wouldn’t call a dog ‘Cracker’.

So we’re calling her Tonka for two reasons:

1) It sounds enough like her old name that she won’t be confused, and..

2) She resembles a Tonka Truck in her ability to go anywhere she damn well pleases. We’re thinking about painting her yellow and installing a horn.

She’s the sweetest old girl you ever saw. Never met a stranger, apparently. Her behavior thus far has been pretty exemplary with a few notable exceptions. First and foremost, whoever said this dog was potty trained was a lying sumbitch. We’re working on it and coming along just fine, but in the meantime, just know that there are few worse ways to start your day than finding one of the Great Lakes in your front entrance way.

Secondly, I have to take Contrary Jr. shoe shopping today to replace the three pairs the dog knoshed on, kibble apparently not being enough. It was a one time incident, mostly because we immediately went out and bought the biggest fucking bone in the world for her to chew on.

Thirdly, she thinks she’s a lap dog. Even as you protest, wheezing and short of breath, she will climb into your lap and take a nap.

Other than that stuff, which we’re working on and making progress with, she’s just about the best dog you could hope for. Plus, she stinkin’ cute.

How could anyone resist this?