I’m Finer Than Frog Hair

 Thanks for asking.

If, like Mrs. Chili, you’ve missed me and wonder what I’ve been up to  but are just too shy to ask, here’s the quick, dirty version.

Business is increasing slowly but steadily and I’m really feeling good about it. (However, if you know somebody who has a wad of cash they’re looking to get rid of, I could use the additional capital. I’m just sayin’.)

It takes a lot more mental energy than you might think.  Even if I’m not at work, all I’m thinking about is work. Which means that I don’t end up having a whole lot to say to the world in general unless I talk about work.

So I’ll talk a little about work.

We’re putting together a radio ad set to air next week.  I’m really excited about it and only wish we could afford more spots.  The spots are only $12.00 per for 60 seconds of airtime, which is a darn good deal, as it’s on their most popular station at prime listening times.  The only problem is that we can only commit to 16 spots right now ($200.00) which will be played twice on both Thursdays and Fridays for the next month.    I’m sure the spots will at least pay for themselves, but I’d really like to see a more than decent return on the investment, so that we can justify upping the number of spots.  So if you have a spare 12 bucks, feel free to send it this way!

Pookie had been keeping up with the yardwork both at home and at the shop, which I only let go on for oh, a month and a half before I decided that was unfair and insisted on doing the work at the shop myself.   So for the first time in 13 years (since I taught Nate how to use a mower) I have used a mower.  It’s amazing to me that I used to make a pretty good living when I was a kid mowing for other people, because it turns out that I don’t like it much.

I’m doing it though, even though I have a husband who is perfectly willing to do it, so I deserve props for that.  Besides, it comes in handy when a dog has an accident and Miranda cuts her eyes at me like it’s  my turn to clean it up.  All I have to do is point to the farmer’s tan I’m getting from doing ALL the mowing, with NO help from her and voila, she’s a poop cleaning machine.    Which is why I’ve refused her repeated offers to help with the mowing.  I much prefer this arrangement.

(has anyone else noticed that this is no longer short and not at all dirty?)

Now, in the My Kid is Weirder Than Your Kid department, Little Man (the 4 year old) spent all day yesterday drawing belly buttons.  Hundreds of belly buttons.  I have no idea what this means, but I’m sure one of his future therapists will be only too happy to tell me.

Ok, for those who made it through this far, you deserve a laugh.   I now present the funniest Lou Rawls video ever. Though, in all honesty, there wasn’t a whole lot of competition.

The first few seconds are in Spanish, but then it’s all English, baby.

8 Responses to “I’m Finer Than Frog Hair”

  1. Jo Baby Says:

    As a Nurse who’s assisted with these procedures..
    and as a patient that’s had to endure the embarrassment of having an colonoscopy…
    THIS video is HILARIOUS!! Thanks for posting it!

  2. Lynnster Says:

    I hope things keep improving on the business front. I bet they will.

    Belly buttons… well, there’s worse things he could be obsessed with.

    Glad you posted, hadn’t commented ‘cos I’ve just been too swamped but as always, missed ya anyway.

  3. mrschili Says:

    HEY! Welcome back! I WAS worried, and I’m glad that you’re still upright and functioning.

    As for the mowing; did you, or did you not, tell us not too long ago that you bought yourself a goat? Do goats not love to eat grass and are essentially, in fact, living lawn mowers? I ask not out of any personal experience, mind you – I didn’t grow up on a farm or anything, so am not privy to that kind of knowledge – though I DO know that our NPR station mentions something about how wonderful a power company is for “using sheep to control vegetation under power lines.” Sheep and goats ARE different creatures (I may not have grown up on a farm, but I DO know that. Duh!), but they’re not THAT different, right?

    I’m just sayin’.

  4. Contrary Says:

    I haven’t posted about it, mostly because I’m still really upset about it, but someone stole Herbie (our little goat) right out of his pen, through two large gates and a no trespassing sign.

    So, we’re not getting another baby goat until we can get a guard donkey to keep it company and protect it.

    I know the entire world thinks I’m weird for the animals I manage to love (I also have a hairless rat and I think she’s gorgeous), but we had come to love that little goat. He was just about the sweetest little guy whose capacity for affection and goofiness seemed fairly boundless.

    Anyway. So, no, we can’t just let the goat get it, but I sure wish we could.

    ( impressed and gratified that Mrs Chili [or anyone for that matter] pays that much attention to anything I say)

  5. Fishie Says:

    Um, so there’s a black market in goats now? Wow, and I just thought my end of the state was a little off. Whew!

    Here’s hoping things randomly fall off Herbie’s captors. Like organs and such. I saw lots of donkeys down here on my travels delivering Mother’s Day Flowers to West Podunk. Come visit and we’ll test drive us some burros.

  6. Pookie Says:

    Fishie: it’s not so much a black market, as it is a meat market. Literally. When I joked that we should name the goat “Cabrito”, little did I know!

    Like Contrary, I’m still extremely PO’d about the “kid”napping. I liked the little booger a lot, but I’m mostly angry because someone had the cojones to go through our big locked “no trespassing” gate, then climb over a 6′ welded steel fence to hoist him out of the pen.

    The local stock yard and livestock auction directly adjoins our back property line. This past Saturday, a herd of goats was sold at $6-10 per head. Our kid, at 90 days, might have brought $12 at auction.

    Just bringing that up to point out what a cheap b*****d a goat thief has to be.

  7. Lynnster Says:

    Oh…. I’m so sorry about the goat. That made me cry. 😦

  8. Luciana Says:

    I just discovered your blog (following a link in a hilarious comment you left in another blog) and you are now in my bookmarks. You are a really gifted and funny writer!

    Just a little correction: the language spoken in the video is actually Portuguese, not Spanish. Related languages, but different enough that you can’t speak in one just by being a native speaker of the other. I’m Brazilian and the video is in Brazilian Portuguese :-).

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