Updating from work, because I can, Motherfuckers

To all you who have been clamoring to hear what happened on my last day at Large Multi-national Corporation (all one of you), you’ll be glad to know that it was rather anti-climactic.

I was going to weave a story full of intrigue and violence and bullshit, but at the end of the day, I’m too tired to do anything except tell the truth.  The truth is kind of boring, y’all.

It was actually a pretty good day.  I felt much the same way I imagine a prisoner feels packing up his shaving kit and girlie magazines on his last day in the joint.

I did have one manager tell me (when I expressed disinterest in someone else’s  breach of stupid, useless policy), “You are still the salon manager even if it is only for a few more days, you know.”.  To which I replied, “Actually, I’m salon manager for about 30 more minutes, but I haven’t given a shit for awhile now.”.    Hee.

We’re running a bit behind on opening the new place because the owners were renovating and got screwed by their ‘contractors’ (‘contractors’ here meaning the meth heads their son hired so he could pocket some of the renovation money).  So March’s rent money will go toward April’s rent instead and we’ll be officially open less than a week later than we intended.

Which is fine because it gives us time to accomplish some other stuff, like fuck around on the internet while ‘at work’.  That’s right, I can now screw around on the internet while at work, like all the rest of you slackers.

Also, I wanted to show you what our banner (sign) will look like.   Just go here and have a look.  I have to tell you that when my daughter saw it, she said, “Wow, our phone number is easy to remember.”.   She said this completely without irony.  She’s so pretty.


Conversation between Pooter and I the other evening.

Him: (low level fussing)

Me:  What are you fussing about?

Him: Because I’m upset. (‘because’ is his default sentence starter)

Me:  You’re not upset. You’re pretending to be upset. I know. I’m a girl.

Pookie (in the other room):  Snort.

9 Responses to “Updating from work, because I can, Motherfuckers”

  1. mrschili Says:

    I have nothing witty or constructive to say, except to say “heh.” LOVE the comment about being the office manager. Oh, and Pookie deserves a smack.

    I’m glad you’re not freaked out about not being able to open on time. I’m not sure I’d be taking it as well as you seem to be.

  2. Pat K Says:

    I can not believe you used such language,
    when you know delicate folk like me read this.

  3. mrschili Says:

    Honestly? The language is part of what keeps me coming back! Rock on, Bitch!

  4. kate1976 Says:

    I have made a note of that smackdown for my last day at work (not handed in my notice or anything yet but I can dream, right?)

    I wish I had a pet and lived near you so I could be a loyal customer!

  5. wayfarerbrian Says:

    I saw the sign (no Ace of Base quote intended). As a former sign guy, I can say it’s good. It’s straightforward, easy to read, with good balance and just the right amount of artistic–and the phone number is certainly easy to remember! Heh.

  6. AndyThePug Says:

    Now I fell obligated to point you at THE online screwing-around-at-work site, fark.com.

    Give it a try. That dog with shampoo in its eyes can wait.

  7. Chris Says:

    Congrats on the last day. Go forth and kick ass!

  8. Lyvvie Says:

    Wow! I’ve haven’t yet, until today, met another dog groomer on the blogospere! I’m an ex-groomer (no real money in it in the UK, but the USA is a whole nother thing) who fancies up my MIL’s cocker spaniels – no it’s ok, they’re actually not insane.

    Sign looks great, hope it all goes awesome for you! I’ll be keeping a look in!

  9. Organic Mama Says:

    Behold the mighty snark – way to GO!

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