School Daze

Some of you already know that we are homeschooling the girl child. I won’t go into the reasons we are home-schooling her, because the point of this post is not to start some great debate. Basically, if you feel like home schooling is the province of gun-toting redneck Christians, you’re right. I’m not here to convince you otherwise.

Besides, we have been known to tote guns, Pookie is most decidedly a redneck and we don’t have quite enough to kids to be Catholic.

Suffice to say that the girl child was a well-liked honor student with no record of misbehavior whatsoever when she came to us and asked to be home-schooled.

So, anyway, this evening I was reading the report she’d written for the book Catcher in the Rye. It was a very thorough report and gave the reader (me) a good sense of the plotline, timing and motivations of the central character.

I just wanted to quote a line out of that report for you, because I almost peed myself while reading it.

She says, when referring to a particular character , “Luce was a real butthole, by the way.”

Y’all, I snickered for 5 minutes.

I guess she has her writer’s voice pretty well in hand, although I probably shouldn’t encourage such editorializing. I’m pretty sure her college professors won’t be nearly as tickled as I was.

I give her an A+!


10 Responses to “School Daze”

  1. Pookie Says:

    I can’t imagine from where Girl Child gets her bent for sarcastic editorializing. (Where’s that darn eye-rolling emoticon?)

    Contrary didn’t point out another editorial comment: “Holden called Sally and told her he would come over Christmas Even to trim her tree. No dirty thinking there, lady. lol”

    Okay, so I do know where she gets it. I love ’em both. 😉

  2. raggedyandy Says:

    i think the raised eyebrow emoticon is the more approproiate one.

  3. Aunt (partial to the princess) Jo Says:

    As long as she spelled “butthole” correctly, I’m agreeing it’s A+ work. Princess may not want to use “LOL” on her college work in the future though… too funny.

  4. Mrs.Chili Says:

    This post has been removed by the author.

  5. Mrs.Chili Says:

    Okay, look: I’m an English teacher. I have the diploma(s) and the license to prove it. You didn’t ASK me, but I’m going to give you my opinion anyway because, well, you’d expect nothing less, would you?

    I have no issue with the idea of home-schooling, really, aside from the fact that it’s the province of redneck, gun-totin’ Christians. That being said, I really do worry that there are a lot of opportunities for shortcomings in a home-schooled student’s education. There’s a reason that a child will be assigned to another teacher’s classroom if the parent teaches in the child’s school.

    Here’s what I want you to do: ask Girl Child to come up with as many different ways of describing Luce as she can come up with in, say, ten minutes. Explain to her that there are a lot of different situations that can arise in the course of one’s life, and having the ability to speak appropriately in as many of them as possible is a very important skill to have. You’re right; a professor won’t be impressed with “butthole” as an adjective. Aunt’s right, too: IM shorthand is RIGHT OUT.

    Knowlege is power, is what I’m saying here, People. And the power to manipulate rhetoric? That’s where the REAL juice is.

  6. Andy Says:

    Meh, I attend public schools, and I once described Guy Montag’s wife in Farenheit 451 as a “dumb blonde”

    That was actually a joke with my teacher, though, since somehow or another that day we had been talking about “dumb blondes” in class, and she was blonde.

    I think I got an A, too.

  7. Andy(seriously partial uncle) Says:

    mrs. chili,
    considering how intelligent and driven Contrary is, i think girl child is better off becasue she is going to get more one on one teaching and more attention than most teachers are able much less willing to give to the individual student. most teachers will just throw the same thing at all students when not all students learn the same.

  8. Mrs.Chili Says:

    Oh, Andy-Seriously-Partial-Uncle! I meant absolutely NO offence by my comments, please know that. I love Contrary and, even if I didn’t, I’m smarter than to suggest to ANY parent that they shouldn’t teach their own children what is usually the province of the schools to teach. Remember, I’m a teacher – I’ve BEEN in the schools, and I have seen what wastelands they can be.

    My comment was meant mostly to point out that, as parents, we can sometimes be a little easier on our kids than strangers would be (though I know that the argument for the reverse being true can also be made – we’re often our kids’ toughest critics). We tend lack a certain sense of objectivity when it comes to our kids – I know *I* certainly can, and that’s where the motivation for that comment came from.

    If apologies are due, consider them given. I’m not here to piss anyone off or to pass ANYTHING that even HINTS of judgement. I love my profession, though, and the subject that I teach, and I have a deep and abiding passion for the idea that our ability to use our language effectively is an incredibly powerful weapon in the arsenal of our lives. I want to see as many people have that big gun as possible.

  9. Fish Says:

    That is so cool, doing the lit thing with the kiddo. The Bigun and I have had much fun reading the same bilge and critiquing it. I remember reading In Cold Blood with her and discussing it to no end, and then looking up the Monarch Notes online to triple check ourselves. Dumb teacher took the entire test from the Monarch quiz.

    We really enjoyed reading Memoirs of a Geisha for fun. Lots of buttholes in that one to mock.

  10. desiree Says:

    Your child is a genius, but then you already knew that.

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