Reality Bites

I have recently become a reality show convert. As recently as 3 months ago, I was loudly proclaiming how I didn’t watch reality TV and I never would and by the way, those who did were big losers. Not that I’m a judgemental prig or anything. Ahem.

Ok, so I would watch Cops, but, really, who wouldn’t? Everytime they were called to a trailer park because people were drunk and attempting to kill each other, it was like a family reunion for me. I miss the good old days. Sigh.

I would watch shows like Trading Spaces on TLC, because, OMG they’re putting fur on the walls!!!

But really, that was it for my reality TV.

Now, my TiVo is working ovetime trying to catch all the new shows I’m watching these days.

First, we have Project Runway. I have a really good excuse for why I started watching this show. About a month ago, we were tearing up the carpet in the living room and the TV was on Bravo and we got sucked into the show as we were working. It was a marathon showing of the first season. By 6pm, my floors were naked and I was rejoicing, mostly over the fact that that bitch Wendy Pepper didn’t win (and I am still frankly amazed that she got as close as she did).

Now, every Wednesday evening, I give the TiVo enough time to record it (no commercials!) before I watch it. My feelings on this season so far, in a nutshell: Vincent must go. I don’t give two craps that he sold out his 401K to go into designing. He’s nuts and he sucks. Angela, whom I hated with a burning passion at first, is growing on me.

My next new show is America’s Got Talent. The fault for this lies with my cousin Jo. Now, I can’t turn that awful pile of crap off. Thanks Jo! There is an asswhipping in your future.

Next we have Gene Simmon’s Family Jewels. This show is AWESOME. For one thing, he’s about as old fashioned as you can get while being a playboy who refuses to marry the mother of his children. His kids and ‘wife’ give him grief at every turn and it’s hilarious. A dad who’s a good sport is a wonderful thing to see. Also, I used to be skeered of the guy, but now he just reminds me of my dad, if my dad ever wore make-up and dragon boots. Which, if he did, I would like a picture of that. It’ll come in handy explaining my weirdness when the kids eventually try to have me committed.

And finally, we have Work Out. Mostly for the ‘Oh no, they din’t!’, factor, which is considerable here. The crap her employess pull while she’s out of town is just wrong. Also, Jackie is totally hot and if I was a different kind of girl, well, Pookie would be a very happy man. Heh.

What are y’all watching?

Oh, while I have you here, I wanted to show you something. Our internet service was turned off for a few days because of a little misunderstanding. We understood that if we paid our bill on time, we’d have internet. The DSL company understood that it has absolute power and that even when they make a mistake and turn off someone’s internet, they can turn it back on whenever they want, DAYS later. We also understand that they suck.

So anyway, Pookie sent me an e-mail to let me know we had, well, e-mail (he also left a little hand written note for me, because he knew I wouldn’t actually check to see if we had internet). I wanted to share his e-mail with you because, Good Lord this man is cute.

Subject: Check your mail?

Because you can.

I made this happen.

Because I love.

And also, because I have the power to throw lightning bolts at those
who displease me. Such as, telephone companies.

Hah! They dance for me!

The things you learn, loving me.

I love you.

K.

No, I do not believe he could be any cuter.

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